


when i watch the world burn, all i think about is you

by fanmoose12



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Action and Drama, F/M, Pre-Relationship, Winter Soldier!AU, it's 2020 already but here i am writing ca:tws au like it's 2014
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-19
Updated: 2020-01-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:29:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22318645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanmoose12/pseuds/fanmoose12
Summary: Hange couldn't believe her eyes.Right in front of her, a dozen or so meters away stood Levi. It was illogical, impossible, he had died years ago and she watched him die. Years has passed, but she hadn't forgotten his face. Hange knew, she would never forget his face - how could she when she so often saw it in her dreams?However, Levi looked at her like he didn't recognize her, like he didn't know her.or a winter soldier!au but with levihan
Relationships: Hange Zoë & Levi, Hange Zoë/Levi
Comments: 7
Kudos: 82





	when i watch the world burn, all i think about is you

His mask fell.

Hange couldn't believe her eyes.

Right in front of her, a dozen or so meters away stood Levi. It was illogical, _impossible_ , he had died years ago and Hange had witnessed it, stood there helpless and watched as her best friend fell to his death down the cold snowy mountain.

But here he was now, staring at Hange with cold, emotionless eyes. It wasn't an uncommon expression on Levi's face, but she was sure that his eyes never looked so hollow. There was always something in his gaze, some emotion, well hidden for the other people, but not for Hange. She always saw right through him, knew him better than anyone. That meant she knew for sure that it was Levi. Years has passed, but Levi didn't seem to change. The only difference was the big scar that ran on the right side of his face. Hange hadn't forgotten his face. Hange knew, she would never forget his face - how could she when she so often saw it in her dreams?

However, Levi looked at her like he didn't recognize her, like he _didn't know her_. It was the Titan's programming, Hange was sure of it. Whatever happened after Levi fell, they must have found him and done something to him. Something that made him forget his previous life, lose all of his memories. Something that made him change his principles and work for the enemy.

Hange wasn't a fool and she knew that Levi hasn't attacked her yet only because he was waiting for an order. Probably from the blonde man in glasses, who stood beside Levi. She also knew that she definitely was a goner, if Levi would be fighting with all of his might. He was strong before and Hange could only imagine how much Titans had enhanced his abilities. She couldn't fight him, but she couldn't leave him either. Hange knew about Titan's programming and she knew that it could be broken. It would be very very hard, but she had to try. Levi would have done the same thing to her.

With that in mind, she raised her hand and called out to him loudly.

"Levi!"

"Who the hell is Levi?" He asked confusedly. Hange felt her heart break, he didn't even remember his own _name_. All of it was her fault, Hange thought bitterly. She didn't save him, didn't protect at the moment Levi needed it most and now he suffers for her mistake.

"You really don't remember?" She said quietly, her voice breaking in the middle of sentence.

However, Hange didn't have much time to get emotional, because in the next moment Levi took out his gun and started shooting. He apparently got his order to get rid of Hange, because then he started moving towards her. Hange could only turn around and start running. There was no point in fighting with Levi if you didn't want to get killed. As she ran, she spotted Moblit fighting with one of Titan's agents. She grabbed his hand and dragged him away.

"We need to run!" Hange shouted, successfully dodging one of Levi's bullets. She looked behind her and Levi was still following her with his gun. He wasn't running, though, probably hoping to just shoot Hange. He was following them slowly, which meant they still had the chance of escaping.

"Where's Mike?" Hange looked around frantically, trying to see the blonde man. Moblit pointed to the left.

There Hange saw Mike. He was running towards a car. Once he reached it, he shot one of Titan's man inside and then opened the door. Hange internally thanked Mike for his quick thinking. A car was their only chance of getting out of here. She headed to Mike, still holding Moblit's arm. Suddenly she heard the sound of heavy footsteps behind her. She quickly glanced behind and saw that Levi was running after them. Shit, Hange thought. He was moving much quicker than Moblit and her and at this rate, they wouldn't make it to the car in time. She needed to distract him somehow so Moblit would get to Mike safely. She let go of Moblit's arm.

"Go!" She shouted, already turning away to face Levi. "I'll distract him!"

She sensed Moblit's hesitation and so she pushed him forward. Thankfully, after a moment, he started running away.

"It looks like we are alone," she said to Levi. He also stopped and now was standing in front of Hange. However, unlike her, he didn't seem to be interested in conversation and raised his gun, aiming it at Hange. Hange raised her shield.

"You know, you always told me that you would kill me one day. I didn't think you meant it seriously."

Behind her shield, Hange looked closely at him, trying to see some bits of old Levi. An exasperate roll of his eyes or an irritated 'tch'. There was nothing, though, no emotion behind his eyes. It looked like he didn't even hear Hange speaking. He started shooting and Hange hid behind her shield. Levi shoot a few more times and then he surged forward, running at Hange and knocking her to the ground. It knocked out the air out of her lungs and Hange loosened the grip on her shield. It fell to the ground with a loud thud.

Levi was standing near her, his gun aimed right at her head. Hange knew what was going to happen next. She closed her eyes, thinking that her death wasn't that bad if Levi was the last thing she saw.

However, instead of the sound of a gunshot, she heard the sound of brakes screeching and then the sound of a body falling. She opened her eyes and saw a car. Moblit already got out of it and was helping Hange up. She looked to the side and saw Levi laying on the ground. Her hand twitched to go and help him, to at least check if he was alright, but she stopped herself. It would be a stupid move. Of course, Levi would be fine, she doubted that a car slamming into him would kill or seriously damage him. Also, whether she liked it or not, he considered her an enemy now and would surely kill her the moment he would set his eyes on her. So she accepted Moblit's hand and let him get her in the car.

Once they started riding, she looked in the rear window and saw that Levi was already on his feet. He probably would start shooting at their car if they wouldn't be fast enough, but despite everything, Hange felt relieved knowing he was fine.

"Do you know this man?" Moblit asked, when they successfully managed to escape.

"I... It's a long story," Hange signed tiredly. "I'll tell you when we get to Erwin."

  
  
When Hange told Erwin about Levi, he didn't look surprised. Hange expected him to be happy at the news that a friend they had buried years ago was alive or shocked that he was now fighting against them. It turned out, however, that Erwin knew everything. Hange shouldn't have been surprised but she still felt betrayed.

"You knew Levi was alive?" She asked Erwin furiously. "And you didn't think of telling me that?"

"Hange..." Erwin rubbed tiredly at his face. "You have to understand..."

"What do I have to understand, Erwin?" Hange shouted, loudly banging the table, where Erwin was sitting. "He was my friend! I deserved to know he was alive all this time!"

"I wasn't sure it was him!" Erwin shouted in return, not able to keep his temper in check. Hange suddenly remembered that she wasn't the only who suffered. Erwin lost his arm in that mission and Levi was his friend too. "I wasn't sure it was him," he repeated much calmer. "And... I didn't want to give you false hope."

"I grieved for him, Erwin, all this time I grieved," Hange sank into the chair beside Erwin. She bowed her head, tired and defeated. "I still see him in my dreams, you know?"

"I do," Erwin said sadly. He took Hange's hand in his and squeezed it tightly. "I know how much he meant to you and I remember how much his death broke you. I didn't want to give you false hope and then see it shatter."

Even though, she was furious with Erwin, she understood his reasoning. She remembered all too well the time after Levi's death. How she tried to bury herself in her work, forgetting to eat and sleep. How every time she closed her eyes, she saw Levi falling down that damned train. How whenever she fell asleep, she woke up, screaming his name and outstretching her hand trying to save him.

Hange thought she would never get over Levi's death, thought it was better for her to die alongside him than to continue alone. However, a month after his death, Erwin came to her room. He looked at the dark circles under her eyes, her dirty hair and stinking clothes. He told her that Levi would hate to see her like that, that if he had seen the way she lived, he would think of her as pathetic. It was cruel words and Hange got mad at Erwin for them, but it the end they were exactly what Hange needed. After that, she returned to her previous life, she worked less and ate more. She hanged out with Mike and then she met Moblit and became friends with him. He listened to her thoughts and ideas, tolerated her quirks and seemed to understand her. He was a good friend, caring and reliable, but Hange still missed Levi. She still had troubles sleeping and frequently woke up because of nightmares. However, life went on and time healed her wounds. But today they have reopened.

"What should we do?" Hange asked quietly, holding onto Erwin's hand tightly.

"I don't know," he told her honestly. "It's hard to break through Titan's brainwashing."

"I could try."

"You could," Erwin agreed. "And I think, if Levi is still able to return, you are the only one who can do it. But Hange, remember that we have a mission. Titans will kill millions with their satellites if we don't stop them."

"I know. I won't get distracted until the mission is done, I promise."  
  


  
They still had a day until Titans would activate their satellites and so Erwin ordered Hange to take this time to rest and prepare for the mission. In the evening, Moblit knocked on the door of her room.

"Can I come in?" He asked softly as he poked his head inside. Hange nodded with a small smile and he entered, taking a seat near her bed.

"I came to talk. I... I read your file, I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have done it, but..."

"It's fine," Hange assured him with a smile and gentle pat on his shoulder. "There is nothing there that I wanted to hide."

Encouraged by her words, Moblit continued.

"The man we met today, the one who was attacking us, it was Levi Ackerman, right? He was your friend during the war?"

Hange motioned him to sit next to her on the bed. After Moblit did so, she laid her head on his shoulder and he hugged her shoulders.

"He was much more than that," Hange began quietly. "I was a lonely child. I had no friends and everyone in school considered me weird or even crazy. But then, one day I was walking home from school and I heard someone fighting in the alley. I rushed there, thinking that someone needed help. I saw a kid, shorter than me, fighting off three guys, that looked much bigger and stronger than him. I wanted to help him, but soon understood that the kid was doing well enough on his own. I stood there speechless as I watched him move around, dodging all of their kicks and then delivering his own blows. One guy tried to sneak up on him, though, and I lunched myself at him, making him fall over. That was the moment the kid finally noticed me. He kicked the fallen guy in the head and then turned to look at me. His face was full of disgust. Said that he didn't my help and would have been fine on his own. However, I was having none of it. He wouldn't have noticed that guy without me, so I _did_ help him. Besides, his moves were so cool and I immediately wanted to become friends with him."

"So you did? Become friends with him?"

"Oh, it was a long way from here," Hange continued, chuckling. "I kept following him around and soon found out he was at the same school that me, just a few years older. He kept telling me to stop pestering him, saying that I was annoying, filthy, weird and loud. However, kids at school stopped bullying me. I was wondering why, until own day I saw Levi talk with a guy, who always called me crazy freak. I saw how Levi told something to him, although I couldn't hear what. Then Levi pushed him and the guy hurried away. It made me understand what they were talking about. Levi raised his head and saw me, he quickly tried to leave but I caught up to him. I hugged him tightly, saying he was the bestest friend ever and that I appreciated him looking after me. He tried to push me away of course, saying that I was delusional, but the awkward blush on his face told me more than his rude words. After that, Levi stopped pushing me away. He waited for me before school, so we could walk together. At lunch, he sat next to me and even accompanied me to the library. He rarely read something there, but he seemed content to sit next to me, sometimes listening to me reading aloud. He introduced me to his mother and I saw how much he loved and cherished her. He always tried to act cold and emotionless, but Levi was kind and gentle to the people he cared about, even if he hid it behind rude words.

"His mother died when he was fourteen and Levi started living with his uncle. He was unpleasant man, who dealt with some illegal activity. I suspected that he made Levi participate in it as well, but he had never told me about it. His uncle left him a few years later and I made Levi live with me and my parents. It was a hard battle, making him agree to it, but I was always more stubborn than him. However, two years passed and my parents died too. We were left alone. I tried to continue studying, while Levi started working. Together with my scholarship and his salary, we managed to build a somewhat comfortable life. And then, the Titan's war began. Levi immediately got recruited, which wasn't a surprise. He was healthy and strong. I wanted to follow him, but I got denied again and again. My eyesight was too bad and I used to have serious asthma attacks. Levi left to war and I was left behind. I didn't stop trying to get in the army, though, and one day Erwin found me. The government tried to make a super soldier serum and he was looking for a scientist to help with a formula. I agreed on one condition: whatever I came up with, I would be the first one to test it. Erwin got no objections to that, and well, you probably know the rest. The experiment was successful and I came to the frontlines. I reunited with Levi. Even though, it was war, I had the time of my life. I was finally able to do what I always wanted - help save the humanity and my best friend was on my side. And then, there was _that_ mission and that fucking train and I wasn't fast enough, wasn't strong enough and... Levi fell." Hange's voice broke on the last word.

Tears started welling up in her eyes. She tried to hide them, but Moblit gently took off her glasses and pressed her tighter to him. Hange hid her face in his shirt. Soon Moblit felt that his shirt was wet. He started slowly caressing Hange's hair.

"It's fine," he said soothingly. "Hange, it wasn't your fault."

Hange venemently shook her head.

"You don't know, you weren't there," she said, sobbing loudly. "He died because of me, and then it turned out that all this time he was suffering at the hands of our enemies! They made him forget everything, even his own name! He looked at me like... Like he didn't even _know_ me."

"Whatever Titans did to him, I'm sure you can undo it." Moblit said it with such confidence, so unlike how he usually spoke, that Hange started to believe him.

After all, she became friends with Levi once, second time shouldn't be that hard.

  
  
The soldier slowly came back to his sences. Titans always knocked him unconscious after a mission, Zeke said they did it because he needed to rest. The soldier didn't care about that, he didn't care about anything. Although, it wasn't completely true. That woman, whoever she was, she made him feel _something_. She called him some name, Levi or something. Why did she do that? He had no name, he was just a soldier. For the first time, it occurred to him that others had name, but he did not. Why? And if he really did not have a name, why that woman called him Levi? No one had ever called him that before. The name sounded almost _familiar_ , but he couldn't tell where exactly he heard that.

"Why do I not have a name?" He asked Zeke as he approached him. Zeke made doctors check up on him even though he wasn't seriously injured. But it was a rare occurrence for the soldier to get an injury and so Zeke decided to make sure that he was ready for his next mission.

"A name?" Zeke looked confused. "Where did you get that nonsense from? You are a machine and machines don't need names."

There was no arguing with that. The soldier knew his purpose well, Zeke made sure of that.

"Anyways, we have a more pressing issue right now. You failed your last mission," if the soldier knew what fear was, he surely would start feeling it now. There were only a few missions he failed, and each time his failure was followed by painful and cruel punishment. But the soldier didn't have feelings and so he just continued to stare blankly at Zeke.

"I won't punish you this time," he told soldier with a small smile. "But only because we have no time for that."

"What do I need to do?"

"The woman you fought before, you let her escape," the soldier nodded. He didn't know why he did that. He could have shot her, his gun was aimed right at her head and she just laid there, weaponless and helpless. He could have killed her, _should have_ killed her. But her eyes... They looked at him like... Like he meant something to her. Those eyes did something to him. They made him feel uncomfortable but he still couldn't look away. They hypnotized him. He didn't even notice a car until it hit him.

"So, now your mission," Zeke continued, breaking the soldier out of his thoughts. "Is to find and neutralize her. You understand?"

The soldier nodded and Zeke turned to leave. Before he got to the door, though, the soldier asked another question.

"That woman, have we met before? She seemed to know me." He decided to leave out the part where the woman called him by a name, knowing that Zeke would get angry. He was proved right, when Zeke turned around and his face was furious. He came to the soldier and slapped him hard.

"You didn't hear what I just told you? You have to kill her. Anything else is irrelevant."

The soldier understood that he wouldn't get anything else out of Zeke and so he nodded, accepting his answer.

Zeke still stood in front of him, studying his face as though to check if the soldier really understood him. Seemingly satisfied, he smiled victoriously and left the room, leaving the soldier in the dark room, alone with his thoughts about strange woman.

Hange had only one chip left. After she inserted that one in the needed slot, Erwin would be able to redirect the satellites' energy at each other, saving millions of targeted people. Erwin and she devised the plan and then with a help from Moblit she made chips.

She would need make sure that others are safe and Titan's satellites were destroyed, and then Hange was going to find Levi. She would make him leave Titans with her, even if she needed to use force. Once he would be out of danger, Hange would make him remember his life, would make him remember _her_.

And if that wouldn't work, then she would simply become friends with Levi once more. If he couldn't get back his memories, then Hange would make the new ones. It sounded easy in her mind, but Hange knew that reality would probably be a lot different. She was sure it would be hard to make Levi accept her help and friendship but she wouldn't let him get away this time. She let him go once and she wasn't going to repeat this mistake.

Hange took out the chip and walked to the platform, ready to insert it inside the glass lid. She opened the lid and put the chip inside. Now all she needed to do was to close the lid and then push the activation button. Hange raised her hand to do that, but suddenly she heard the sound of footsteps. She turned to look behind and Levi was standing there, his gun ready to shoot. Hange took out her own gun and also aimed it at Levi. She wasn't going to shoot him but Levi didn't need to know that.

"Just let me push this button, okay?" Hange grinned at him. "And then we can go home or if you really want it, we can fight. But I have to finish this first."

For a moment, Levi just kept silently staring at her. Then suddenly he started shooting and only Hange's quick reflexes saved her from a certain death.

"Fine," Hange said as she started to come closer to him. "I didn't want to hurt you, but you leave me no choice. I'm sorry, Levi, but innocent people are going to die. I can't let that happen."

Hange shot at Levi, aiming for his head. He dodged the bullet, but Hange was expecting that. She used that moment and surged forward, knocking into Levi. Not expecting her to attack so soon, he couldn't keep his footing and both of them fell to the ground. Hange fell on top of Levi and she quickly immobilized him by grabbing his wrists and keeping them above his head. Levi thrashed violently but Hange's grip was strong. She held his arms in one hand and used her other arm to reach for her gun. Then she took it in her hand and hit Levi with it. He seemed to lose his consciousness and Hange hurried upright and towards the platform. She closed the lid and her hand reached towards the button. However, a moment later a loud gunshot rang. Hange looked down and saw that the blood was already seeping through her costume. Her left side started to hurt viciously. Hange gritted her teeth and finally pushed the button. She took a deep breath, trying to calm her racing heart.

Levi wasn't wasting his time, though, and was already near Hange. He kicked her in the leg and Hange fell to the ground. Her wound was already making her dizzy and Hange wasn't sure how long she would be able to keep her consciousness. Levi came closer to her and she hit his leg with her shield. Levi stumbled and Hange used that moment to reach for her earpiece.

"Moblit!" She shouted in it. "I've inserted the final chip, tell Erwin he can blow up the damned ships."

"But Hange, you're still inside!"

"I said, _blow them_ , Moblit! Don't care about me!" Levi was already on his feet and so Hange started shooting at him to keep him away.

"Hange, no-" Moblit began, but Hange angrily cut him off.

"That's an order!" Hange shouted finally.

There was a moment of silence, with only sounds of her gunshots.

"Roger that," Moblit said quietly and then the line went dead.

Hange focused her attention on Levi. He took out his knife and was waiting for Hange to stop shooting so he could attack. Hange was still laying on the floor and she had no energy left to get up.

"You should leave soon, Levi," she told him softly. Her gun ran out of ammo and she carelessly tossed it away. Then she took off her glasses. She wouldn't need them anymore. "This place is going to blow up to pieces."

Levi's face turned furious. He jumped at Hange and raised his fist, hitting her in the face.

"I am not Levi! That's not my name!" He shouted as he hit her again.

Even as she laid bloodied on the floor, Hange still managed to smile.

"It _is_ your name, stupid," Levi stopped, his fist still raised in the air. "It's fine if you don't remember," Hange continued, happy to see that Levi was at least listening to her. The ship beneath them started to fall apart as the explosion rang. Neither Hange, nor Levi didn't seem to notice it. "I can remember for the both of us. And even if you would never remember our past, we can always build our future," Hange raised her hand and gently touched Levi's face. He stared incredulously at her. "Just come home, Levi, I missed you."

Some emotion flashed in Levi's eyes, it was so quick that Hange barely managed to see it. A moment later, he became angry again.

"Shut up!" He screamed, raising his fist again. This time he didn't hit Hange but the glass floor beside her. "You don't know me!" Levi hit again and again it was the floor. "You don't know anything, you're just my mission! I have to kill you!"

"Then do it," Hange told him in the same soft voice. "If you really don't remember me, then kill me. Otherwise I would follow you until you agree to become my friend again."

Levi stared at her, unmoving. And Hange was probably too dizzy and disoriented from the blood loss, because it looked there were tears in his eyes.

A moment later the floor beneath them collapsed and Hange began falling. She closed her eyes, accepting her fate. In her last moments, she hoped that even with her dead, Levi would be able to escape from Titans and get his life back.  
  
  
Hange slowly opened her eyes. It felt weird, wasn't she supposed to be dead? Instead she was laying on a sandy coastline. She looked at her torso and saw that it was bandaged with what looked like a ripped cloth. She tried to sit up to have a better look around, but a gruff voice stopped her.

"Keep still, or else you'll start bleeding again."

Hange didn't need to look at the person to recognize him. Levi's voice, gruff and cutting as it was, was Hange's favorite sound and she could never forget it. She still turned around to make sure that her mind wasn't playing tricks on her. She squinted to take a better look on the dark figure. However, the person started moving and soon sat next to Hange.

"I told you not to move around," he said in the same annoyed tone of voice. It reminded Hange of so many conversations between them that she felt like crying.

"You saved me," she said, smiling triumphantly. "So it means, you remembered?"

Levi didn't answer her, but instead studied her face for a long time.

"You look weird," he said finally. "There is something missing."

Hange thought about it for a moment and when it finally dawned at her, she started to laugh.

"You mean my glasses?"

Levi stared at her again and after a minute he nodded.

"Yes," he agreed. "You can't be four eyes without glasses."

Hange smile grew bigger as she heard the familiar nickname. She didn't realize how much she missed it. No one except Levi dared to call her like that.

"So you really remembered, yeah?"

"No," Levi shook his head. "I got back some bits of my old life, almost all of them about you, but... I don't think I am the same Levi you knew before."

"I don't care about that," Hange waved him off nonchalantly. "You changed and I changed too. That's the way of life. Everything changes and the only thing that matters are the people we care about. I don't care who you've become, you always will be my best friend. Nothing can change that."

Hange outstretched her hand towards Levi. For a second, he looked at it doubtfully, but then he took Hange's hand in his. Hange interlocked their fingers and squeezed Levi's palm. She turned to face him, a soft smile on her face. Levi looked back at her. His gaze wasn't as hollow as it was before, no, Hange could clearly see the same softness she remembered from years ago.

Hange turned her gaze towards the river in front of her. She laid her head on Levi's thigh and watched as the sun was slowly disappearing below the horizon.

  
Hange knew there was a long way before Levi would completely come back. Or, maybe he would never return to the way he was before. Hange was okay with that, she was okay with anything, really. The only thing she needed was her best friend back. She was sure that whatever troubles awaited them in the future, together with Levi they would be able to overcome them all.

**Author's Note:**

> why is hange wearing glasses if she's supposed to be a super soldier?  
> i don't know! but i just couldn't picture her without them


End file.
